1) Which of the two leading characters in Saawariya is more mentally disturbed?
a) Ranbir Kapoor's Raj
b) Sonam Kapoor's Sakeena
2) Which of the following two is the stupidest thing Sonam's character does?
a) Falling in "love" with Salman (without having a clue about him) and waiting on a bridge with an umbrella every night for him
b) Spending every moment every night with Ranbir, cultivating a weird "dosti" (knowing fully well he is nuttier than a pecan pie), and needlessly falling into his arms every two seconds
3) Which of the following best describes Sanjay Leela Bhansali's (SLB's) state of mind as he was making the movie?
a) Crazy
b) Delusional
4) Clearly, SLB has major issues. Which of the following do you think needs more urgent attention?
a) Repressed dislike for star families,especially Kapoors, which made him reduce two promising star kids to mere caricatures
b) His secret swadeshi ambitions (which foreign studios would ever invest in India again after this?)
c) Some unknown issues with Rani Mukherjee....why else would any director do this to her?
5) Who is the most irritating character ever seen in Hindi cinema?
a) Amitabh Bachan in Jhoom barabar jhoom
b) Rani Mukherjee in Saawariya
6) Who has emerged as the biggest losers in the Saawariya debacle?
a) The producers
b) The audience
c) The world of cinema
7) Who/What do you feel more sorry for?
a) A dignified lady like Zohra Sehgal reduced to acting in movies like this
b) The color blue which will forever be associated with this disaster
8) Which city do you think the movie's sets are inspired by?
a) Venice
b) Pakeezah-land
c) Who cares...its a trip to hell for the audience!
9) How did Sonam Kapoor give such a fine performance?
a) Thanks to her dad's genes
b) As giving halwa to unsuspecting guys is something we all have a lot of experience in
10) What do you hope to never EVER see again?
a) Long haired heroines with backless blouses flirting with every lame guy they come across
b) Ranbir in a skimpy towel or a hat
c) Rani Mukherjee in another not-so-special appearance
d) Another Sanjay Leela Bhansali movie
11) If you are one of the few people (other than SLB and his mom) who watched the entire movie, which of the following two statements describes your condition better?
a) A part of you has died forever
b) You now need therapy for the rest of your life
c) Both of the above
4 comments:
Brilliant Brilliant Brilliant review. Your concept amazes me.
You are evolving into a fine critic indeed. good show, I say, good show!
Like the way you used rhetorical questions (hopefully they are!!) to get your views across.
As my daughter may be inclined to say, good one, Saru.
Is the movie really that bad?? Thank god I didnt waste 16 pounds on tickets and chose to watch Om shanti om instead !!
Sanjay Leela Bansali needs to be tied upside down and whipped for doing this LOL
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